If you have read any of the posts on this blog, I hope your perception of me will be that I am a positive person. Indeed, I like to think of myself as a positivity blogger, therefore please take this post as it is written, a light hearted look at a few of the mishaps we have been having on our wonderful holiday on St Lucia. And I say wonderful, because it is wonderful, the island is a paradise and the resort is beautiful with lovely staff, clean and comfortable apartments and fabulous food.

Andy and I have been lucky to visit Mauritius, Egypt, The Canaries, The Dominican Republic and Cape Verde in the 11 years we have been together and I have loved every single holiday. We have never been delayed, had any accidents, or had any issues with the hotels or carrier and each one has passed without incident.

You could say therefore, that perhaps this time, we were due a few … difficulties. Here then is an account of the first 3 days of our holiday on St Lucia and a number of incidents, which would try my positive nature, starting less than four hours after we arrived. (I had promised that my next post would be a review of the hotel, and resort, but keep tuned, the review will be next!)

Having checked in, and had a quick explore around the grounds, we were in our comfortable airy apartment and I had just had a shower. I was padding back into the bathroom to get a comb, when the world turned upside down, or rather I did. Both feet flew out forwards from under me at speed on the slick tiles, and my back hit the floor with a crash, slamming my head and my bottom into the concrete. The thing about falls is that they are so quick and so shocking, and I was tearful and pathetic for a good hour after. Andy, whose bedside manner is more ‘Mr Fix-It’ than ‘Mr Sympathetic’,  having placed a bottle of cold water on my head on the rapidly forming bump, was keen to go to the bar.  I did manage a sniffly, rather pathetic limp downstairs an hour later, and we had a drink and some dinner, but I was in bed by 9pm.

The next day I awoke feeling like I had been in a car crash. It took me ten minutes to get out of bed, everything was stiff and the lump on my head was quite an alarming size. My bottom was decorated in a bruise the size of my hand. Andy said I was being over dramatic as I winced and griped, and reminded me that if I had been concussed,  I would probably have died in the night.

Meanwhile, having booked this holiday purely for the windiness factor, (for Andy’s kite surfing), there was no wind. It was still, completely still. If I was Mrs Pathetic, Andy was rapidly becoming Mr Grumpy, not least because he was paying an exhorbitant fee to have his kitesurfing equipment stored on the beach every day.

It was at this point, against my sage advice, that Andy opened his work emails… and got the news that he had not been successful in a recent interview for a promotion. Oh dear. Lesson: Never open work emails on holiday.

Day two couldn’t be any worse, (we thought), and indeed the wind situation at least seemed to have improved, quite a lot actually, because  we now seemed to be in the centre of some sort of tropical storm. No kitesurfing today then. We consoled ourselves at the bar, not even mildly surprised, when my ridiculously sized beach bag knocked over my first my gin and tonic, soaking everything in the vicinity.  While we sat, I listed which bits of me still hurt following the fall, while Andy listened with interest (not). He did however, think it would be a good idea to report the fall, if only to advise management that maybe a sign on the wall to warn against slipping in the hotel bathrooms, or more practically,  non slip mats on the shiny floors,  would be a good idea.

Back up in the room and now walking everywhere with small steps, very gingerly as I was terrified of falling again, I was getting ready for dinner, when I heard a crash from the bedroom, and several expletives from Andy.  He had knocked a large, full,  (expensive) bottle of my L’Occitane body oil off the shelf, and it had smashed into millions of glass shards and coated the floor with oil. I think we just both stood and stared at the mess for a few seconds, wondering what could possibly go wrong next.

We spent the next 40 minutes trying to get all of the glass off the floor, (it seemed to have scattered to all areas of the room), and mop up the huge amount of super slippery oil. We soaked several towels and then tried to wash the floor with shampoo and water. Mr and Mrs Exhausted went down to dinner.

Next morning, we left a note for the cleaner, warning her to be careful in case there was oil or shards we had missed, and then headed off to speak to the Virgin rep about my fall. They are certainly very thorough. We spent at least 45 minutes with Ryan, the very friendly and helpful Virgin rep, who was insistent I see the resort nurse to check me over. We trooped off to see the nurse and spent another hour in her office while she chatted away to us about all manner of subjects, mostly nothing to do with my fall,  but she was sweet and lovely so I didn’t mind. We were about to leave however, having completed a report for her files, when she informed us we had to do a (third) report to file with security. Andy and I couldn’t work out quite why hotel security needed a report regarding my bruised bottom,  but apparently they did. The security chap was very amenable, but wasn’t a fast writer and we were there another hour.

We headed back feeling a little frazzled to the pool, but Andy thought he saw a nest of fire ants (?) so we returned to the beach.  Andy is allergic to ant bites apparently. Apparently if one had bit him, that would be all sorts for me to write about!

So, it is now day 4 in the morning and I’m hoping that the holiday will be a lot less.. er…. eventful from now on.

Today, so far the only thing that’s gone wrong is that Andy’s Sudoko book is a soggy mess, as I left a wet bikini on it, but I think we can deal with that.

The holiday is still lovely. It’s 31 degrees.  I’m on a sunbed looking out over palm trees, a beautiful warm sea and it’s nice and windy, so Andy has headed off up the beach with hope in his heart. And if these annoying things are going to happen, it’s best they happen when you are in paradise, right? ❤️