20 Steps to Self Empowerment


We all love the feeling of empowerment. Self empowerment is the ability to feel in control of your life and the freedom to make your own decisions …but it is also about having confidence and trusting those choices. Here are my 20 steps towards feeling more empowered. Please leave a comment and tell me what works for you!

1. Have a personal Motto/Mantra. Mine is “To thine own self be true” from Hamlet. Admittedly not great advice in the context of the play,  but it really resonates with me. Make sure you choose something personal to you and motivational.

2. Learn to love yourself ..and if you can’t do that, at least like yourself. Take a good look in the mirror and appreciate all the myriad opportunities and possibilities there are. Yes, there will be aspects that you aren’t keen on, but try and look at the whole picture, don’t just concentrate on the negatives.

3. Don’t give in to envy and jealously. There will always be others who are more successful, beautiful, talented etc. You don’t have to be the best to feel successful. Find something you like doing and do it for you!

4. Trust your own judgement and instincts.  They will never let you down.

5. Create or build something from scratch. This is Andy’s contribution and I couldn’t agree more! There is nothing more satisfying than the feeling of having built something from nothing.


6. Try not to become a people pleaser. You can’t please all of the people, all of the time and you will only make yourself unhappy in the trying.

7. Practice saying “no”. It does not make you a selfish person. There are ways of declining without hurting others.

8. Visualise yourself being successful at a job interview, at a course, even on a date! I’m a big fan of visualisation. Run it in your head like a film.  Try it, it really works!

9. Only invite people into the circle that make you happy and add to your life. I know I have mentioned this in other posts, but having negative people around you is draining, exhausting and ultimately the opposite of empowerment.

10. Challenge yourself. Do something that scares you.  These experiences will be among your proudest achievements.


11. Eat (relatively) healthily ..but remember to have the odd treat (or two).  Mint choc chip ice cream anyone?

12. Exercise. It’s the best quick fix of empowerment I know. It instantly removes stress and makes me feel more confident.

13. Listen to well meaning advice of course, but remember it is just that. Advice. You are the best judge of what is the right course of action for you.

14. Don’t worry too much about criticism. It will always come, but use it to your advantage and don’t let it bring you down.

15. Be kind and help others when and where you can. Be generous (not necessarily in a monetary sense) and compassionate.  The smallest act of kindness will be returned, not only in a karmic sense, but also in a feeling of wellbeing.



16. Have integrity when dealing with others. Even if they don’t show you any.

17. Don’t put your happiness in other peoples hands. Commit to making your own  happiness.  Make plans, set goals and record achievements in a journal.

18. Whatever age you are, consider the opportunities open to you. It’s never too late and tomorrow is a new day.

19. Don’t settle for second, third or fourth best. Don’t resolve to stay in unhappy relationships/jobs/situations; You derserve more!

20. Finally, remember that you are unique and the possibilities are endless. Believe in yourself and commit to making the changes to achieve the life you want.

“We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past. But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future.”
Steve Maraboli 

5 replies »

  1. Hello Karen (fellow old chook!) love that you too are celebrating being older, wiser and freer to do what you want! This is a great list. I use JFDI as a mantra. Just F@#$% do it! thanks for the like on my blog too!

      • Thank you and no worries. I am can certainly agree with the sentiments in your own blog! Time for women over 50 to be heard! You’re more than happy to order a calendar!! I am not sure if the order thingy I set up is actually working!

  2. Yes, yes and yes! It’s the LITTLE things that matter… over and over, consistently. #8 particularly is my fav. Oftentimes, I get so caught up on worries, I forget the power of creative visualization. Thanks for sharing 🙂

    • Thank you so much for reading – this is a subject so close to my heart and as you say, there are so many simple things that we can do to feel empowered! ❤️

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